You are the company you keep ~ choose wisely

You are the company you keep. If you want to live your best life you have to surround yourself with people who inspire you, grow you and make you happy.

Think about the 5 people you spend the most time with. It is likely they are a reflection of who you are. If you don't like the reflection, think about people who inspire you, lift you up, and who you admire. Start taking steps to include them in your life and have them become your inner circle. Once you do that, reflect again on the 5 people you are spending your time with and be sure to take note of the positive changes.

Believe in the magic of your dreams....

Believe in the magic of your dreams. Dream BIG!! Write those dreams down...scrapbook them, Pinterest them, journal them. Whatever you do, focus on your dreams and pretty soon you'll be living them.

What dream are you putting off because of the time it will take to achieve? "Time" is never an excuse.... Write down that dream, and each day take one little step in that direction. If you stumble and fall down, who cares. Get back up and start again.

United I Stand with Boston

This morning, with my 7 year old riding her bike at my side, I went out and ran 3.15 miles. It is nowhere close to marathon distance, and my pace was a meager 11 minute miles, but I did the run in honor of all those affected by yesterdays tragedy. My daughter rode in honor of the 8 year old who lost his life. In her words "That is SO sad. He had so many more years to live." I believe that Love and Kindness conquers evil, and the best way to overcome all that is wrong in the world is to go out daily and live your best life. Focus on the things you can be grateful for and inspiring others to be their best along the way.

What did you do today that made a difference? It matters!

Comparison is the thief of joy

 

Comparison.  It is something we all do now and then ~ compare our possessions, compare our life stories, compare our gains and losses.  In fact with social media it is hard not to do right?  Don't we have the opportunity to see every one's highlight reel and say, "Wow!!  Look at what she just accomplished.  How come I'm not "that accomplished", "that stylish", "that successful", "that FILL IN THE BLANK".

This weekend I participated in Portland Oregon's "Race for the Roses".  I fast walked the 10K.  My reason for doing the race?  I have another race that is coming up in August (Portland to Coast -- the World's Longest Relay Race) and they require a 10 K time for seeding the race teams. While waiting to start I observed the crowd of thousands waiting as well.  There were teenagers and there were seniors and everyone in between. There were elite athletes and beginners and I thought about how much I enjoy this race every year.  Everyone is there for their own personal reason.  Like I said, I was there to get my official timed pace (as was another lady I met along the course). I'm sure there were people there who were there because a friend made them go, others who were trying to get a personal best on their time, and others who did it for the first time and those who did it for the social aspect.  One guy showed up dressed as a pirate!! I still want to know his "story"!

Our course through life is very much the same as those who showed up to the race on Sunday morning.  Everyone has their own personal journey they are taking for their own personal reasons.  When you compare yourself in any way to others, you are traveling off course.   You see, their experiences, choices, success and failure isn't meant for you. It is meant specifically for them. To get them to where they need to be. So the next time you catch yourself comparing....STOP...Take a moment and realize that the only thing in that moment you are doing is stealing the joy from your life.

You are good enough, strong enough, smart enough.........Don't forget that. EVER!

Everything comes full circle

I'm a big believer in Karma.  I believe what you put out into the world, comes back multiplied.  I believe if you are kind to someone, you will in turn have kindness come into your life.  I believe if you are helpful to someone, when you are in need, someone will help you. 

For those who know me well, they know that I LOVE to pay it forward.  I get GREAT JOY in doing something for someone I have never met and can never repay me.  I made some Pay It Forward cards that I hand to the person receiving the kindness that wishes them a wonderful day and letting them know that if/when they pay it forward, to include the card because together we can make the world a better place.   Together we can all be GRATEFUL, THANKFUL, & BLESSED.

I started "Paying It Forward" many years ago, and the reason I did was very selfish if I'm going to be honest.  I love to give.  I love to be social. I loved to spoil my friends.  The problem was that when I gave, I thought I was giving with the intent to give. With the intent to see the joy on my friends face when they were home sick and I brought them a get well basket, or on the days that I surprised them with flowers (because who doesn't love flowers).  In reality what I found was that when I was giving to those friends, I had silently included expectations for them that I wasn't consciously thinking when giving them the gifts.  The expectations would come up later, often much later.  Like several months down the road, when I was sick. Where were these friends of mine?   Where was that "return of friendship" via a get well basket, or a meal?

I can tend to be a slow learner of life lessons and at first I felt self pity.  "I'm doing all of these kind things for friends, and when I'm in need, they aren't there."  "Maybe I need new friends?"   Eventually I came to my senses and realized that not everyone LOVES to give. Not everyone LOVES to surprise people with gifts.  Not everyone has time on their hands to go out and shop or make meals when they find out all of a sudden someone is sick.  The lesson for me then became that I needed to find a way to still do Random Acts Of Kindness to get that joy, without it being connected to an expectation that the kindness is returned.  So, I started Paying It Forward to strangers.  Complete strangers.  Like paying for the meal for person behind me in the drive up, or leaving a gift card with the cashier at the grocery store, or buying coffee for the gas station attendant because it is cold out.  In the end the expectations are gone but I can still tell you I get SO MUCH more in return. It ALWAYS comes back full circle, which leads me to this week's story.

 

On Monday I was getting ready to go run errands. I was looking in my closet for something to wear and I thought to myself....once I hit my financial goals I REALLY need to get some new T-shirts. As I was out and about an ad came on the radio about the local butcher and his sausages and I thought to myself...."awwwww, those food splurging days are over." I've set some REALLY strict financial goals, and there  isn't any more play money in the budget. I went to the grocery store and the lines were SUPER long. There is a lady behind the check stands that tells you which line to go to and she pulls me from the back of the line --- there were about 4 lines, each with 6 or so people --- and she grabs my cart and says come with me. Well, that was just an invitation to pay it forward, so I grabbed a Starbucks gift card that was hanging by the register and after she finished ringing me up and handed me my receipt I handed her the Starbucks gift card and one of the Pay It Forward cards and wished her a wonderful day.

After I came home I couldn't decide where to get started with chores and I looked outside and saw some blue sky and decided some fresh air would be good for me and mowing the lawn equals exercise so that would be my choice for my afternoon chore.  As I was out mowing the lawn, a friend pulls up with a BIG smile and a wave as she gets out of the car. She says, "I have some swag for you!!! I had these T-shirts made with our towns school logo and with all the sporting events you attend, this is the perfect swag for you my friend!!! Enjoy your day!" I gave her a big hug and thanked her, and then off she went. As I looked down at the shirt, she had safety pinned a gift certificate to the butcher for 2 lbs of sausage.  A smile crossed my face and I sent up gratitude for everything that comes full circle.  Monday morning I'd wished for T-shirts and Sausage, I had gone out and performed an act of kindness and that kindness came back that afternoon         via an unexpected visit from a friend.  

I'm a planner and that HAS to STOP

Yesterday I woke up and had a plan.  I was going to have a GREAT day and I knew exactly what I was going to do.  I got out my notepad and made a list.  I was going to call my friend, with whom I started our Grateful, Thankful, Blessed Facebook page.  We've hit a milestone --- 2000 likes!!!!  We need to make a plan to celebrate!!!  The night before I'd sent her a text....shall we do a day trip to the beach? Seattle? Kahneeta?  Shall we go and see a presentation by a local author?   She hadn't responded to the text last night so that topped my list of things to discuss.  Next was her birthday...it is coming up....how were we going to celebrate it?  That was #2.   #3 Was figuring out the way to add a Grateful Thankful Blessed logo to our own personal photos ---  like the pros do it. I had attempted to do that for HOURS the other day and that isn't my super power.

I had a plan!!  I love having a plan!!  It makes me feel like I have control of how my day will go and this was going to start my day off with nothing but conversation, celebration and happiness.

So, I sent her a text -- "Are you free for coffee by phone?"

Her response ---  "Actually no -- I just started my project for the day.  In my groove..........Have a great day!......."

OUCH!!!!   ----  That stung a little.   Really?   She can't take time for me?  Not 20 minutes --- give it a time limit?  Not later in the afternoon.   WOW!  Okay....got it......she apparently didn't get my mental memo of all the great plans I had.

Now what was I going to do......Not wallow in pity.....I can't make someone a priority who makes me an option. That certainly won't do.  So, I guess I forgive her and move on.   But, inside me there was just a little sting of .....I had a plan.....It was going to be a GREAT day......It isn't starting off with the warm fuzzies and excitement I'd expected with more PLANS to come in the future........   I HAD A PLAN FOR A GREAT DAY and it was ruined.

Then my cell phone rang........It was a friend of mine that was between flights and hanging out at an airport.  We chatted for an hour as she shared her travel stories with me and we reconnected.   Well, maybe this morning isn't so bad after all I thought to myself.

Then there was another phone call. This time with a neighbor who has been in a challenging position with her job and shared that she had come to peace and resolved the issue!!!   We celebrated her decisions and came up with ways we could save the world and by then it was afternoon and my day was wonderful, and maybe the universe had other ideas for my GREAT day.....maybe I didn't need that plan after all.....maybe there is a lesson there....hmmmmmm.....

I had a night out scheduled with my cousin's wife that we'd planned several weeks before and I was looking forward to reconnecting with her, so as I sat and ate lunch I sent up gratitude for unmet plans.  So far, my day had turned out  much better than expected.......and then my phone rang.

It was a friend I've known for years.  We've never really done anything together.  Shown up to a few social events and said hello.  I've attended her birthday party, she attended my New Years Eve bash a couple years ago.   She called to ask a question  and we had been texting about getting together for coffee to discuss a PLAN for the school committee we are both a part of. As we were chatting she says "You've been to my house right?"  "No" I've replied.   "Oh!!! Come to my house for coffee, lets not meet at the cafe`! We have so much in common, we need to get together !"  A new friendship in bloom. Can the day get better?

The answer.....Yes!  Yes it can!  You see I received an email saying, "I'd love to show you my new house!!!  Please come over to my house for a tour!" from my cousin's wife with whom I planned to have pedicures.  By late afternoon, I was in my car, my favorite songs playing on the radio as I make the 30 minute road trip to her new home. I was taken on the full tour and it is beautiful. She has it beautifully decorated, and it is the perfect fit for her family.  Then it is off to Starbucks where she treated me to a mocha and we head to the nail salon, where we sat reconnecting and visiting and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. In fact at the end of our pedicures the ladies said, "You sit here and chat for 10 minutes."  10 minutes later they came back, and said "You ladies stay. You enjoy chatting as long as you like."  I'm positive it was probably 30 minutes later that they came back to check on us, and then WE WENT TO DINNER!!!   We tried a restaurant that was new to her and we chatted and laughed and shared stories of life and the lessons it gives us and when we were leaving the restaurant I thought to myself....this day can't get any better.   But it did, because as we arrived at her house, my cousin (her husband) and just come home with the kids....so I got hugs and hellos and that pretty much made my day perfect.

On my way home I thought about my original PLAN for a great day.......Again I sent up gratitude for unanswered PLANS.

As I came home and walked in the front door I was greeted with hugs and the kids telling their stories about their day and I thought, "this is my life, how lucky am I" and enjoyed their company until they went to bed and then my husband and I partook in our Wednesday night ritual.......watching Survivor (which we record so we can skip the commercials...don't judge us....we are reality show junkies...me MORE SO than him).

When the show ended, I thought to myself....What a wonderful day!!!   As I walked into the kitchen I looked on the dining room table, and there on the table in a vase were a dozen red roses. "Oh my gosh!!!  There are roses in here!!!  What are these for?"  My husband, all Mr. Practical says "They are for you!"  I ask why and he responds, "Well, because I haven't bought you flowers in a while."

With that my day ended.....GRATEFUL, THANKFUL AND BLESSED and determined to have a great day WITHOUT PLANS, for the rest of my journey.